To the editor:

It is strange that things are going so well since we have former Vice President Joe Biden as president. Some people say he has done nothing, but that is not true. He immediately made gas prices skyrocket by cutting off the oil supply. He immediately put the vice president in charge of the border and we now have more illegal aliens than ever before. In the early 90s he said that Haiti for all he cared could sink to the bottom of the sea and the world would be a better place. Now, he is welcoming the Haitians into America and is going to burst the heads of the border patrol that tried to stop them.

To show his change toward the American military he got them out of Afghanistan first before the rest of our people. He was even at the Dover airport when 11 of our 13 brave soldiers were brought home in coffins draped with the American flag, but he still cared if his Timex was working. Forget that he didn’t want to kill Bin Laden, but he killed seven innocent Afghans because the buck stops with him.

He “woke” up one morning realizing his enemies were racists. BLM were his friends. They reminded him of the good old days of Rap Brown, Eldridge Cleaver, Stokely Carmichael and “Devil’s Night” in Detroit every Halloween when they would riot and try to burn down the city. After all, kids love to have fun. The smell of burned out cities today and him doing nothing shows he is not a racist. There are many unqualified people in his cabinet, which proves he is not a racist. Maybe he could invite the leader of Haiti up for a visit and take him to the border to show him how well he is taking care of his people. He might even take down the statues of Austin, Houston, Bowie, Crocket and Travis and put up a statue of the new Premier of Haiti.

What a hard worker we have in the White House. Oh my! He lives in a White House. Maybe in his closet he has a Klan robe that was worn by Robert Byrd. Maybe he could rent it out to Gov. “Blackface” Northam of Virginia for a little cash that he and his family sorely need.

I can’t wait until next week to see what the champion of open borders, “woke”ism, high taxes, war on fossil fuels, the un-vaccinated and systemic racism does. Right now, we are somewhat of a Republic, a liberal democracy, but I’m beginning to see a hammer and cycle in our future.

Deeply concerned,

James Brown, Spearsville Road (Submitted by Amy E. Patterson, Nineveh)

Editor’s note: This letter to the editor was submitted as satire.